Stress vs. Relaxing

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So there’s a spectrum. All the way to the left, there’s a person, blowing their brain juices all over a desk because they can’t stop thinking about things they have to accomplish, finish, start, and work on. They have a stack of RedBulls scattered around a garbage can and tear soaked tissues coming out of every one of their pockets.  

And on the right, there’s a person sleeping. 

I have always been the person on the left. Crying on the floor of my bedroom telling myself that I’m not good enough and will never get through what I need to do. How many times have I woken up in the middle of night in tears because I can’t sleep without accomplishing something. Snot dripping everywhere, red puffy eyes, but a look of determination that would scare even the burliest of men. Can you image? Not being able to sleep because you want to accomplish more. 

It’s sickening.

But I can’t help it. I’ve been like that ever since I can remember. I enjoy being that person who can say they’ve already been there and done that. I like finding things out on my own, though I do take all information and instructions I get to heart, memorized, probably categorized in a drawer somewhere.

And then, you have my boyfriend. He’s always told me to relax. We’ve been together almost six years and when it comes to stress he’s at ease. No sweat, let’s nap and go to lunch and go paint a picture and learn how to play a guitar and get things done later. 

Yeah, that’s not me.

But throughout out six years together, I’ve only seen him breakdown from stress like me twice. The kid is always calm and collected, but always gets things done.

I’ve tried to implement this in my own life. I’ve tried to slow down and trust myself. I don’t let myself fail, so why would I start now? And with this new sense of calm I’ve developed, I’ve also been a happier person. I deal with stress in an entirely different way. Deep breaths, step by step, giving myself time. 

And if you can’t get through that and you are like I used to be, you’re going to living your entire life upset with yourself. 

It’s super cliche, but really do stop to smell the roses. Things will get done. Make time for yourself and worry-free time. Let yourself take a three hour nap, but get up and wash your car after. So what if it’s 9 p.m., I bet you feel rested and happy. 

Props to my boyfriend for teaching me how to deal with life. 


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